This was a conversation between an alien and her fellow alien in an alienated medium. It’s somewhat alien-ish, just try to understand this post from an alien point-of-view…
Rin told her bad-day story and I listened. I gave her some words from my point-of-view, and the conversation went more interesting. She asked about my ‘personal’ life (by ‘personal’ in her terms, it means my love life).
me : (explained the details) . I’ve been thinking for 2 weeks and I don’t know anymore about what I’m fighting for and who I’m fighting for. I just need time to be with myself for a while, I guess.
Rin: hm, actually, I feel it too! I’ve been manipulating tasks for another tasks just to let me have some time for myself.
me : hahaha. I’ve been ignoring phone calls, text messaging, etc. I worked out insanely in the gym until I felt like I can’t move my body. I just want to stay inside my room, eat take-away foods. Being alone. Not talking to anyone. I’ve been so self-centered for almost a week.
Rin : yep, be a BITCH. (whoa! hold on, in this case, BITCH = Babe In Total Control of Herself.)
me : lol! I’m alienating myself actually, and it feels good!
Rin : yeah, we need to get away from our routines, our deadly tasks. I want to runaway to some place where I can be with myself and experience a new thing.
me : So do I!!!
That conversation could only be legit between me and my long-life-best friend. We have so much in common.
Don’t get us wrong after reading the conversation above. It’s not like we’re alienating ourselves for months and ran away from our responsibilities. We just took a time-out for 3 days. 😀
I’m not the kind of person who will abandon my responsibility and give up just because I’m tired. It’s just lately, everything is just too much. Exams, plant design, home works, university admissions for master program, people who consult their problems to me, etc.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t like people talk to me. I’m glad if I could be a help or just listen to them, but sometimes it’s just over my capacity. When someone need a consultation, I have to put my time and focus to listen and analyze. It’s not easy and I never underestimate whatever things that they shared to me. I’m not a therapist or a psychologist. I just try to put myself in their position, and in my opinion, sometimes they just need a person to listen to them.
School stuff has been so hectic. A decision about taking a job offer or a master degree, has to be made as soon as possible. Guys problem has to be cleared without causing any mess. I have 6 days left to submit all my equipments design and I stuck with a tunnel drier’s design!! It’s added with some people consulted to me about love, broken-heart, family matters, business, friendship, education, etc.
My brain worked like more than 16 hours a day. I was so tensed! I wanted to tell that I need a break, but I’m not good in expressing my feeling verbally. I’m always depending on my head, but at that time, my brain refused to do me a favor.
Don’t worry, it happened before and I’m still mentally healthy. 😀
Alienated myself is something that I usually do when I get so tensed. Just be with myself, being a hermit.
This is the list of what a hermit did for her 3-days-getaway:
-I slept 12 hours a day
-I put 85% vol in my ipod and worked out like crazy in the gym
-I ate take-away foods
-I ignored all phone calls, messages
-I watched a comedy series and laughed out loud
-I put an insane status in my messenger.
(This is one of my favs : Don’t upset me, I’m running out of places to hide the bodies :P)
-I checked out old photos of me and my friends, and remembered all our memories, and smiled.
-some other madness, all inside my room.
That way, I can let my brain cooled down, therefore I can sort things out. You might think that I’m a weirdo, it’s fine 🙂 Every one has his/her own way to overcome rough times. So readers, if you ever feel like me few days ago, and get inspired to alienate yourself, go ahead. Or perhaps, we are in the same shoes, don’t worry, it’s legit! and I’m doing it too!
It doesn’t matter when will you face difficult times, where will you put your feet at that time, and how will you manage it, you have to be able to control your emotion and never get carried away. One more thing, I’m not suggesting to run away from your problems. You can’t. You might think it’ll be over, yet it’s still there, unsolved.
Face it bravely. If you need time to gather your energy and to sort out a new strategy, retreat. After everything has settled, finish it.
Life is beautiful, yet complicated. We only live once, but if we do it right, once is enough. 🙂
p.s: I’m back in charge now, otherwise, I won’t be able to write this, lol.
Want to know how complicated is a chem-eng work? The pics are just A BIT of all the works 😛