I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
It was a rush,What a rush
‘Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It’s just too much,
Just too much
Do you ever think
When you’re all alone
All that we could be?
Where this thing could go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you?
Are you holding back
Like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t going away
90% of friends who share and talk to me, are usually on ‘amour’ issue. Break-ups, relationship, commitment, crush, and so on. While break-ups are still the most favourite topic to discuss with me, a topic about ‘crush’ is always come up after that. So, now I’m going to talk about ‘crush’.
Noted : I’m not a love guru, trust me I’m also not good in it, but well yeah, lets figure it out together.
What is a ‘crush’? This could be explained as a feeling of excitement and rush of a certain person, and usually when you’re having a crush on someone, you feel like there’s a thousand of butterflies in your tummy, your heart beats fast, you can’t think of anything else but that person-day and night (okay it sounds quirky now), and the last common thing is you will say,”ohh, I think I’m in love!” Okay, now stop for a while. Love? Is it?
A feeling of crush might seem difficult to settled out at the beginning, but in a few weeks or months, it will even out and your emotion will be under control. However, IF a crush dealt with a mature manner/reason, eventually it can be an everlasting friendship or … a romance (relationship). You might ask,”so, it is all coming back to me?” YES. By reading this post, I assume you are mature enough to define yourself and your need.
It is understandable that during our path of life, we are likely to fall-in-love for several times. Each and every time we have a special feeling on someone, we call it ‘love’ and it will feel like a final deal. The question is, is it love-right-now or love-LOVE? Then, how can we tell the difference? Well, we can’t really.
Every relationship, no matter how painfully it may end, will be a waste of time. On the other hand, it will teach you a valuable lesson about yourself and help you to know what you are looking for (and not looking for) in a partner. In a way to find the ‘love of your life’, you will jump and fall, hurt and healed, and of course meet the wrong ones. It is part of the deal. The only thing that you can do is choose carefully who is worth your love.
If you agree to these 3 statements below, you can continue reading this post :
1. You are not sure if it’s a crush or love?
2. You want to upgrade ‘crush’ status into ‘love’?
3. You are helpless and for whatever reason decide to trust me 😛 (I’m kidding, just go on)
I will try to briefly explain by telling you the real case. I have 3 people who might dangerously infected with a ‘crush’ syndrome and have agreed to be examined. Lets call A, B, and me. Yes, me. 😛
A is an adorable girl who broke-up with her first love. A was painfully hurt, yet she has recovered successfully and moved on. For weeks, she has been telling me about a guy who she’s having a crush on. She adores him because of his beautiful smile, his gestures, the way he looks at her, his deep voice, his athletic body, his personality and so on. She could smiles all day and night just because of this person. She’s so excited just to see this guy for an hour and could be so sad if he doesn’t show up. Technically, I could tell that she’s madly having a feeling of crush. The thing is, she doesn’t know if he feels the same way as her. Next thing, in her case, she doesn’t know him well and not sure if they are even friends.
B is my great guy friend who just broke-up with his gf because of a matter of commitment. He’s not ready to take a further step because he still wants to pursue his dreams. In order to move on, he’s finally find himself, having a big crush on a girl that looked so perfect in his eyes. He can’t stop mentioning her name every time we chat, and telling me how amazing this girl is. The only problem is, he is not over his ex yet, and I guess that’s pretty much explain his motivation.
Me is the author of this post (lol :P) who vowed to herself not to fall in love easily after her last ridiculous relationship. Yet, she finds herself several crush (es) during her probation period, and this time, she can’t agree more that she can’t resist to have a big crush on a guy. She is so mesmerized by his looks, his strong motivation, and how he can makes her laugh. Every single details of this guy looks perfect on her and he can makes her feel secure to just being herself. The thing is, she doesn’t know if he feels the same way on her and she feels difficult to let him know. And, the main problem is, she is afraid to let someone in and to trust her heart to a guy.
From the 3 fairy-tales above, I would like to sum some points so you will not suffocated in a crush-lust:
You don’t have to hire a private investigator to find out where his/her cat was buried. Just gather some accurate info, like if he/she is available (not taken). Plus, make sure if that person is EMOTIONALLY available.
Obviously, you don’t want to find out later, that your crush is a sociopath/a serial killer. So, talk with him/her, discuss whatever things, be friends. That way, you know and able to understand the REAL person that you have a crush on. You need to discover his/her inner. Always put in your mind that what looks good in the outside, is not always that good in the inside.
This is the only way to know if he/she has the same feeling as you or not. By building a bond, you put yourself in his/her circle that will let you know his/her point of view of a relationship, intention, future plans, and other sensitive things. I’m not telling you to use him/her, but when you have a feeling on someone, you will want to bond with that person. It is like building a trust.
It is all coming back to you. What makes you like her/him? Is he/she exists in your mind and heart as your runaway? Are you amazed by his/her beauty only? Do you see his/her in your future? Or is it just for FUN? Is he/she worth fighting for? Are you ready for a thing called ‘love’ and a relationship?
In a nutshell, I’m not telling you that having a crush is an unforgivable sin and stupid. Beyond all those thrilling emotions, I want us to step back for a while, understand what we do, and consider every risks and results. You want to have fun? Well, I’m sure, you could find another thousand smart ideas to have fun, but not playing with your heart or someone else’s. Because when it comes to heart, you can’t predict the result and the side effect. We are all grown-ups, and life is too short to waste for something that could possibly means nothing.
If you really feel for that person, pretty sure with what you are doing, and ready to take all the consequences, go for it. Do not deny yourself and justify your opinion. Sometimes your mind doesn’t want you to be in love but deep down you know you are. The greatest mistakes we make are the risks we don’t take. If you think something will make you happy, go for it so that you won’t live your life asking, “What if?” and telling yourself, “If only.”
Last thing is, when you make decisions, follow your heart and not your mind. For if your mind’s decision fails, you regret. But if your heart fails, you just smile and say, “Nice try.”
And what about the author? Is she falling in love or … ?
She has been thinking a lot and now it is the time for her to let her heart decide. Life is like an hourglass, somehow it will hit the rock bottom, and be patient, for it will turn back around. Succeed or failed, that is a part of learning, isn’t it 😀