Dream a little dream

15 Apr

“Every great dream begins with a dreamer”

I’ve been arguing with my parents about my dreams for years. After-graduation issue has been tense recently, and they keep asking me about what I want to do after graduate. And I keep repeating the same answer over and over again that I’m not going to work, I’m leaving chemical engineering euphoria. I want to study culinary arts. From Chemical Engineering to Culinary Arts ??? What were you thinking??? (I can tell you’re asking that).

People tend to judge without analyzing from every perspectives

I know that Chemical Engineering and Culinary Arts is far different. I’m still answering the same answer to the “so why did you choose chemical engineering in the first place?” question. Hello, I’m a human, human make mistakes, and I made mistake. I was so young, I graduated from senior high school in science division. I fell in love Chemistry, and since I had a science background, I chose it without considering the side effects. There is a tendency here (Indonesia) that students majored in Science will take a Science major in the University. Also, there is a belief that science students always smarter (society’s belief, no offense).

I remembered, I was kinda unique when I was a child. While every kids in the kindergarten dreaming to be a doctor or pilot, I was dreaming to be a ninja turtles. When I was in grade 5, I was dreaming to be a CIA agent😀

John Lennon said,”you may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one…”

I found my truly passion in Culinary since my 2nd semester in Uni. I feel pleasure every time I cook and it’s kinda a special excitement I feel when I see people enjoy the food I cooked🙂. I want to learn Culinary Arts further more. My parents doubting me, “what if you take a wrong decision again?”,”there’s a great prospect with your chemical engineering degree”,”is culinary just your run-away project?”, and blah blah blah. I was trying to convince them, that I learned from my past mistakes and I wanna make it right. I know that I can do fine in Chem Eng field, but what’s the point of doing something without my heart in it. I don’t want to live as a living zombie anymore. But I’m not doing any good in convincing them, and I decide to do it in my own way. I’ll do whatever it takes to get my dreams, I want my life to be meaningful, doing what I believe in. Maybe I can only dreaming it now, but I’m going to make it happen, and one day you’ll see me living that dream.

*Little notes to mom and dad,
I know that both of you always see me as your perfect little daughter, but can’t you see that I can’t do it anymore? Can’t you realize that I can’t even cry anymore? When I say I’m stressed and going insane with my studies, I really mean it. I’m saving my every breath to keep survive in chemical engineering. I can make sure that I will not give up with chemical engineering, I’ll prove it to you that I’m mature enough to responsible on my decision. You know that I will do anything to make you happy and proud of me. Didn’t I prove it since I was a little? I understand that you want to keep me away from unpleasant life out here, but I want to feel it. I want to get out from my comfort zone, I want to learn life. I want to write my own life story, not the one you’ve planned for me. I know that it wouldn’t be any better out there, and I’ll try to understand if none of you will support my dreams. Deep inside my heart, I’m still hoping that both of you are going to have just a little faith in me. I’m a big girl now,mom, dad. It’s time for you to let go of me and let me fly. I didn’t blame you for what I have now, in fact I’m thankful for having both of you as my parents. You can be sure that I’ll give my very best to you.

**To my little sis,
hey girl, we’re always believing in our dreams, and I want you to keep it that way. No matter what happened, you got me, remember that. You’re the most brilliant one among us, I trust you that you’re gonna be great. I’ll support your decision. And maybe you can only dreaming your dreams now, but don’t lose your faith, you’re gonna living it one day. Take a risk, take a chance, make a change, and breakaway!

I had my heart beaten down,
But I always come back for more
I don’t have a future figured out,
and maybe this is going too fast.
But what do you say to taking chances?
What do you say to jumping off the edge?
Never knowing if there’s solid ground below
Or hand to hold, or hell to pay.
I just want to start again.
What do you say?

Dreaming is not a sin, and I would say it is essential. We all have dreams. But in order to make dreams come into reality, it takes an awful lot of determination, dedication, self-discipline, and effort. If you have dreams, believe in it, and one day you’ll see you’re breathing it.

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Cheers,
Vness

3 Responses to “Dream a little dream”

  1. yoke cantik April 15, 2010 at 11:23 pm #

    hehehe..
    keep fighting girl !! X)

  2. Lita April 19, 2010 at 9:12 pm #

    make it real beib..
    we always be here to support you..
    xoxo.

  3. Vanessa April 19, 2010 at 9:19 pm #

    hehe, thanks beib, I’m working it out😀
    uda bisa kan?? hehe

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